Tickle Me No

Was meeting an elderly gentleman over coffee at my local Starbucks. When I mean elderly, I’m referring to 20+ years older than me. He seemed nice via text, so why not see if there is any chemistry.

So we instantly recognize each other, and I order my regular iced vanilla chai latte that basically tastes like Christmas in a cup. We find an open table and start the courtship. Haha!

him: Are you ticklish?

me: Yes.

him: Where?

me: Why?

He proceeds to open up his phone to YouTube to show me tickle porn. He informs me he just got into this and it’s a huge turn-on for him. He then tells me the tickler tickles the ticklee until she soaks her panties in urine.

So you can imagine the look on my face at this point. I didn’t know this was a thing, nor was I expecting this over a cup of tea. Not that I am one to judge. It is just not for me.

At this point in the conversation, he can see the expression plastered on my face and tries Plan B. Yoda impersonations. Yes…the beloved green character from Star Wars. I’m as nerdy as the next person, maybe even a little more….but this isn’t going to get my panties wet.

So I used my mind tricks and Jedi’d outta there.

Rogue Rose

Author: Rogue-Rose

Single Mom. Dating Extraordinaire

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